Upset
Tuesday October 18, 2005
For some reason I haven’t been writing as much this trip. Maybe because I am almost never alone for more than short periods now with Christina here. She is a very nice young woman but having someone in the house, sitting next to me on the sofa while I write (she watches tv during the day) affects how I feel about writing. I know that it is odd since she could just as easily go to my journal and read what I have written but I don’t like anyone to read it while I write it. That is when it seems personal to me.
Over the weekend we went to see A History of Violence, the three of us. Then Faol and I went to COPAD meeting. We had a problem because when I wanted to go he blew it off. He was connecting with a woman there and focused on that. I was upset that it took like an hour and a half after I wanted to go before he finally let us do it. Christina was waiting for us to go to the Manor and had been waiting by the time we got home, for two hours. Also by that time I was too tired to go to Alex’s party at the Gemini Manor so his interest in the “new” woman ended up making me lose out on an intended pleasure. I was pretty upset. Then the next morning we talked some and made up, and had the usual intense make up sex, after which he called our hostess to find out more about the new woman, and then called her. He also told me he was going to be calling her when he got home from work and I lost it. I was so upset. It turns out that I am really triggered by that whole have sex with me then turn around and go after some other woman when I am still in the wanting to be with him after sex phase. It was not pretty. But he called in the middle of work and we talked some and agreed to try and work that out too.
So we will see how it all goes.
Copyright © 2005 Kyril Oakwind