I woke up in the night with a headache again and just couldn't get moving today. I really hate when I feel this way - no motivation, no desire to do anything other than sit around. Then all the tapes about lack of discipline, not being able to do things start playing. Maybe this is depression. I sure am depressed by the time I get done beating up on myself but am not sure that is what it is to start. I didn't exercise, do tai chi, or work with trance images.
Finally in the afternoon I went out and finished mowing the Dearinth. I felt a little better about myself after that but not a whole lot. Tom worked on putting roof cement on the barn to take care of the leaks. I made him tea and we went into the hot tub after he was done. The flies have started coming around and they buzz about, fly around and around, land on us. It is very annoying. But I still felt better when we got out.
Callista was online and we had a nice chat. It was good to "see" her again. She said she might come to BelSummer. I would be delighted to see her.
I talked to Tess as well but she was having a relationship problem and I felt bad that she was unhappy. I wish that I could do something to help her.
Copyright © 2001 Kyril Oakwind