I am still waiting for my energy to pick up again. It seems that I am in another medium funk. Yesterday I finally got my altar table cleaned and oiled, and my personal prayer altar reset up. We use the same table for group ritual so I take it down and put it up again before and after each group one. I also cleaned the lower wood cabinets in the kitchen as long as I had the wood soap out. But that was all that got done all day yesterday (other than making dinner).
Right now I am waiting for the space heater to bring the bathroom temperature up to a warm enough level that I will only be cold not freezing. Hmmm, I forgot I was going to soak the showerhead in vinegar to get the minerals out so I can get a decent spray out of it. Guess I had better go do that. *** Well that was easy. The showerhead just unscrewed with no trouble. I am so used to the lack of strength in my hands now because of the tendonitis that I have come to expect things to be very difficult or to require more hand strength than I can muster. It just unscrewed - I didn't even have to get a wrench or anything. Would that the rest of the day would be as simple.
On last Sunday F. looked over at me and said that he didn't know what it was, perhaps my hair being a little longer, or the light, or had I lost a little weight, he didn't think it was the earwrap that I got for Yule, but he thought that I was prettier. I am glad that he thought so but I think it was the three pounds that I lost while fasting for the full moon. It did change the contours of my face slightly and of course, I have now regained all of that since that is just a temporary kind of thing. Ah well. Actually I would like to lose about 10 lbs. It would be good for my knees for one thing, good for the higher cholesterol level that I have, and if it happened because I cleaned up my diet it would be good for my health. But it might take a focus on dieting and I am opposed to weight loss diets because of the damage they do to one's health and, in my opinion, one's self-esteem. If I could manage to stick to my exercising some every day I would most likely lose a few pounds due to increased activity and increase my energy level in general. Now that would be an acceptable way to lose - that or drop some of the fat and junk from my diet, or increase the veggies. But I am not going to concentrate on this or worry about not eating stuff or I get so fixated on eating that it becomes impossible.
I have managed not to cut my hair again, so far. It is only mildly annoying right now because the top section hasn't gotten long enough to get in my eyes but I do notice it. So I am not sure that I will actually end up growing it out but I am still giving it a shot.
The New Year doesn't seem much different than the last one though. No big resolutions, no major push to make changes, little motivation to do anything in particular. The one thing that I have done is to make an effort to pick up taking my vitamins again. In the last several months I have taken them very irregularly if at all and I do think it makes a different in my mood or how I feel physically - probably not a huge difference but some.
Copyright © 2001, 2002 Kyril Oakwind