Geek Decoded

Geek Type: GO/AT = Geek of Other/All Trades.

Dress: d+(-) = Dress ranges from "Good leisure-wear. Slacks, button-shirt, etc. No jeans, tennis shoes, or t-shirts." to "I'm usually in jeans and a t-shirt."

Shape: s: = "I'm an average geek."

Age: !a = "It's none of your business how old I am."

Computers: C+++ = "You mean there is life outside of Internet? You're shittin' me! I haven't dragged myself to class in weeks."

Unix: U = "I have a Unix account to do my stuff in."

Perl: P+ = "I know of Perl. I like Perl. I just haven't learned much Perl, but it is on my agenda."

Linux: L+ = "I've managed to get Linux installed and even used it a few times. It seems like it is just another OS."

Emacs: E- = "Emacs is too big and bloated for my tastes."

Web: W+++$ = "I am a WebMaster . Don't even think about trying to view my homepage without the latest version of Netscape. When I'm not on my normal net connection, I surf the web using my Newton and a cellular modem." And I make money at it. (*ahem* Real Webmasters believe in graceful degradation and platform-independence.)

Usenet News: N = "Usenet News? Sure, I read that once."

Usenet Oracle: o? = "What's the Usenet Oracle?"

Kibo: K? = "What's Kibo?"

MS Windows: w+ = "I have installed my own custom sounds, wallpaper, and screen savers so my PC walks and talks like a fun house. Oh yeah, I have a hundred TrueType(tm) fonts that I've installed but never used. I never lose Minesweeper and Solitaire."

OS/2: O = "I finally managed to get OS/2 installed but wasn't too terribly impressed."

Macintosh: M-- = "Macs do more than suck. They make a user stupid by allowing them to use the system without knowing what they are doing. Mac weenies have lower IQs than the fuzz in my navel."

VMS: V? = "What's VMS?"

Political/Social: PS+ = "My whole concept of liberalism is that nobody has the right to tell anybody else what to do, on either side of the political fence. If you don't like it, turn the bloody channel."

Political/Economic: PE@ = All over the spectrum.

Cypherpunk: Y+ = "I have an interest and concern in privacy issues, but in reality I am not really all that active or vocal."

PGP: PGP>++ = "I've used it, but stopped long ago" but wants to become "I have the most recent version and use it regularly."

Star Trek: t(+) = Ranges from "It's just another TV show" to "It's a damn fine TV show and is one of the only things good on television any more."

Babylon 5: 5++ = "Finally a show that shows what a real future would look like. None of this Picardian 'Let's talk about it and be friends' crap. And what's this? We finally get to see a bathroom! Over on that Enterprise, they've been holding it for over seven years!"

X-Files: X-(+) = Ranges from "It's ok if you like paranoia and conspiracy stories, but, let's face it, it's crap" to "I've Converted my family and watch the show when I remember. It's really kinda fun."

Role-Playing: R+>+++ = "I've got my weekly sessions set up and a character that I know better than I know myself" but wants to become "I've written and published my own gaming materials."

Television: tv = "I watch only the shows that are actually worthwhile, such as those found on PBS."

Books: b+ = "I enjoy reading, but don't get the time very often."

Dilbert: DI = "I read Dilbert infrequently, rarely understanding it."

Doom: D+ = "It's a fun action game that is a nice diversion on a lazy afternoon."

Geek Code: G+ = "I was once G++ (or higher), but the new versions are getting too long and too complicated."

Education: e = "Finished High School."

Housing: h- = "Living with one or more registered Geeks."

Relationships: r = "I date periodically."

Sex: y? = Male. "It's none of your business what my sex life is like."